The (Almost) Graduated Life

I think I've been living as if I had graduated from school since at least September. When I don't have class I do even less than I used to. I've been using 'I need a break' since finishing my comics but it's been about a week now, I had my show and it went really well last week. I have books, they need some changed but I think I need some distance before I want to look at them but outside of that I've been doing nothing.

My birthday is this Friday, I'm 24 this year so I've been using that as an excuse to just watch movies and DVDs this week but I'm feeling unfulfilled. I look at my desk and feel guilty that I'm not drawing anything. I don't have any major projects to take care of right now, I'm going to class and doing that stuff. I'm starting a small project for Drawing Studio, I need to do some watercolor tests but other than that those pieces shouldn't take me too long. I'm continuing with business as usual for Figure and Glass, but I am considering applying to be a studio assistant at the hot shop next summer. It would be a fantastic experience and I know I'd have a hellulva lot of working there. I'm slowing becoming friends(?) with the employees and other assistants and I enjoy working with glass. I have this thing with physical art, i think. I love drawing and I know I'm always going to draw comics but doing something physical like glass work or relief just ends up being so meditative for me which works out really well when i'm in a dark or depressed state. I'm focused on something other than myself that I find it really relaxing and enjoyable. 

But I honestly haven't been doing much with my life outside of class. Watching Portlandia has been super fun this week but I feel like something is missing because I don't have any active project to just jump into. I have a lot of preliminary work to do, I'm hoping to have the second chapter of Cinema ready for print by March, which is possible I need to write it first. I also have some very loose ideas swirling around my brainspace for the second chapter of Lawrence's Diary and I do have 100 Days 2011 to go back to and finish, one thing keeping me from being really gung-ho about that is my pack of warm tone markers is dying and Jerry's doesn't carry this brand anymore. I have found them online but not all 10 that I need (0.5 WG- ShinHan Twin Touch)  so I don't know if I want to to go to prismacolor for the rest of 2011 and then try to find the Shin Hans so 2012 looks uniform or what. I haven't done a value match, those brands might be closer in value and hue than I think. We'll see.

I started this mentioning before that I'm living the life I think I'll have after I graduate, just hanging out and drawing. it's weird because of how unstructured things are right now. I need to get into the next stages for some new projects so I don't waste my time like I'm doing right now. I think i just have class as the most important thing in my day right now, and it is, but outside of that there's nothing really pressing. This is reverse from my usual school year where my work load is light at the beginning of the year and heavy at the end. My work load was heavy for all of September and October and now it's November and I have so little I need to do to be responsible for school. I'm going to try to get back into the groove of getting up in the mornings and drawing a bit before class. I have a bunch of warm-ups to color and scan and I always have new ideas and sketches that happen.  Like This and this from last week, along with others, I want to do some more drawings with the Chickstronaut, I don't know if there's a story there but there are more drawings. She's a space cowboy and I want to develop that concept. I love the design for her suit, I tried so hard not to make the body another IronMan/suit-of-armor plate clone. 

I really want to draw more than i have been, I'm going to try at that. I also have a relief plate to finish that I haven't touched since August. There are always things to draw and create, I just need to get into the mode of creating again. I hope I can get myself focused and on point so it's not so bad when I actually graduate and i really have nothing to do on a daily basis. You know, until I get a day job, I need to make money so i can make more comics. 

Speaking of, go check out my storenvy! I have my hand stapled and folded comics on sale, there's a limited number ready right now, I have 13 books left out of 25, you can have an exclusive first printing if you hurry! I will have more things on sale soon, and I'm going to see about getting my warm-ups online for sale too. Dig it!

I think i lost it a bit while writing, but some of my lamentations have been voiced. I'm glad I'm not really anxious or afraid of things right now. I'm riding the edge of depression but I think I got bitch slapped by it harder than usual because I have so little to do every day. It wasn't a slow build it kind of just happened which is bull. 

Before go, I'm going to name drop some podcasts, I'm kind of distracted so I can't wax poetic on them right now. I've been listening to Skalrbro Country, This American Life, Pod F. Thompkast

Keep on keepin' on, I'll be back again soon, hopefully with  more direction with that's going on and less of me spinning my wheels. Hell, i'll probably write something about my birthday.