Stop Being Bitter About Valentine's Day

I like my post from last year's Valentine's Day so I wanted to re-post it and have it on this site too, so that's next.

Why Hating Valentine's Day is Stupid

Every February singles across America are bitter because they don't have that "one special someone" to lavish them with love, or to lavish with love. They're bitter because they feel as if the world has taken up arms against their singleness so they hate love, they hate positivity and they decide to hate their friends who happen to be in a romantic relationship. I happen to find that whole mindset to be ignorant, spiteful and stupid.  
It's common enough knowledge around these here parts that I am single and I have never had a boyfriend. I've written a few times over the years about relationships, some things positive and some negative. I've also written about love a few times. Those last two overlap but whatever. My point is I'm single and I've been bitter about it, but Valentine's Day doesn't really make me bitter. I'm indifferent because I don't really need to lean that far one way or the other.
It's also stupid for people who are single to pine, cry, and rage about Valentine's Day when conversations like "Worst Valentine's Gifts Ever" get written, every fucking year. Or how about "Valentine's Dos and Don'ts" And to manipulate people there are lists such as "Gifts for Every Woman in Your Life". People who are single take for granted all of this shit, I read it and make a confused face and laugh at the stupidity. Why is it also looked at as the man's responsibility to make Valentine's Day "perfect"? We're I able to, I'd wine and dine my fella because I'd want to.
Going back to single-bitterness, people have taken to calling February 14 "Singles Awareness Day". I feel sorry for these people because they can't accept everything else they have in their lives. I don't have A Significant Other, I have many Significant Others, I generally call them 'friends' because that creeps all of us out a bit less. On a given week I interact with anywhere between 20-50 people who worry about me, who notice when they haven't seen me in a while, who like to see me. Since last February I've made around ten new friends to hang out with, I've added a shit ton of Facebook friends, but that's different, and I feel loved.
I feel loved because I don't sit around waiting for one person to tell me they care about me. I'm not waiting for one person to buy me flowers and candy, to take me out to dinner or to stay in watching some delightfully terrible movie because why should I put everything into one person? That's too much stress and responsibility, it's ridiculous.
People say Valentine's Day makes them aware of how tragically alone they are; that's every fucking day. Think passively about the last movie you watched, just about any genre, there's a male and female lead, they hate each other, then love each other, have a falling out then they get back together before the credits roll. Action movie: the action hero/ine rescues someone else and the victim they rescued falls madly in love with them half way through the movie, there are some sloppy make outs, maybe a fade to black sex scene and finally they walk hand in hand into the sunset after the victim's been saved one last time. Romanctic comedy (I can't remember the last movie that was just a romance without needing the poorly handled comedy) Super hot really successful woman meets super hot/moderately hot/seriously unattractive and unsuccessful man who teachers her how to live and love life again, they have a falling out over something she initially found endearing, they realize they can't live with one another so they get back together. Credits. The comedy, male lead living a mediocre life meets super hot chick and cracks jokes about the main plot and some how gets his life entwined with hers, but not before they break it off for like a movie-day then get back together, a few more jokes and credits.
And it just keeps going on, many movies have a lead and their romantic counterpart and it's generally the same up and fucking down and people get pissed off because one day celebrates relationships. I'm more irritated that I have to deal with some hamfisted, unrealistic romantic relationship in my action movie instead of seeing more explosions, more trains crashing into each other and more monsters getting their asses handed to them. No, in the middle of the fight the leads realize this may be their last or their only chance to tell each other they love them, so movie time slows to like...30 seconds movie time equals 2 minutes real time, so their liplock is on DBZ levels and how fucking long has this been going on.
I'm not lying when I say I wouldn't want to wake up in the morning with someone else in my bed or that I don't want someone else to think about me all the time, but I'm not going to hate other people or a holiday just because I don't have any one else. I have many people. Hell, on Monday I walked around campus giving holographic dinosaurs, temporary tattoos and candy to people. I gave them to people who said they hated Valentine's Day, and they told me I made their day better.
Valentine's Day isn't about one person caring about you, it's about anyone caring, it's about knowing that people want you to be happy. I did what I did because I like giving people things, and I wanted candy but I didn't want to eat the entire bag on my own. You know what's amusing? Seeing a 23 year old geek out over a holographic dinosaur that shows it's skeleton. Seeing the 27 year old who has real tattoos try to put a tie-die patterned peace sign on his forehead, or the 19 year old rush to put a creepily disembodied puppy on her wrist. And that people can't resist the delicious taste of a Reese's mini-cup or a Jolly Rancher lollipop. For a moment people forgot that they didn't have a date for dinner and took joy in the kindness of a relative stranger.
I don't know, people put too much stock into one person caring about them that they forget about anybody else around them who notices when they're not there. If you disappeared for even 24 hours and nobody knew where you went, I'm sure at least one person would wonder and be worried. I like to think about all of my relationships more then just thinking about my non-existent romantic relationships
I dunno, I've just never understood the rage and hatred, especially when people in relationships still hate Valentine's Day because they have to make an effort to prove to someone they love them. The hassle it all is because society puts so much into pushing one day of love and compassion that if the 14th sucks then the relationship is destined to fail. You never win it seems, so I'd rather be happy with many, seeing many and enjoying friendships instead of depressed with one and having no one else to spend my time with.

That's what I wrote last year and I still feel the same. Platonic relationships are incredibly important and under valued. And my movie thing, I don't think that hamfisted love plots make a narrative better, I really would rather see more explosions than a poorly constructed relationship. When I want to yell at the lead to tap that, I'll watch a rom-com and then be mad at them pussyfooting around their mutual desire to rub genitals.

So there is something new to this, this year, instead of passing out bitchin' temporary tattoos I made Love Bites, you can watch me make them:

I also recorded the video version of this very topic where i used a ridiculous analogy because that's how I think.

So, those are my thoughts. I have been twitterpated, I have been bitter about my lack of a significant other, but it's not the end of the world. Instead of being a bitch, do something nice for someone else, everyone I gave a love bite was so damn excited and happy, both the single and the spoken for. People like getting things and they like knowing that someone care, even as a friend. Go make someone smile instead of crying over not having someone to swap DNA and germs with, think about someone else and make their day better. 

I Love Bad Movies*

*This entire post is my caveat to that statement. 

This is a fitting first post for 2013, my watching and reading lists of 2012 are posted on Tumblr and the other day I posted a few tweets back-to-back on why I hoped a movie called Cooties will be 'delightfully bad'. I've recently started reading Nathan Rabin's My Year of Flops the printed version, where he talks about if critically panned movies are really bad or if they were maybe a secret gem. I haven't seen many of the movies he's discussing but that doesn't mean I can't enjoy and appreciate what he's  doing in this book. 

I think about my love and obsession with movies, even when I don't always debate and argue them and talk about their worth and value. I will. I mean, I have a blog where the sole purpose of it was so I'd have somewhere to be obsessive about movies and review them and postulate what-ifs and write about imaginary casts that wasn't my main blog. It's been quiet for a while, I haven't seen too many things where I felt the immediate need to write about it. Or I haven't had the time and whatever other terrible excuse I have for not writing about movies and television I like. But I do, I love most movies I see. I love the weird things, I love the bad acting, I love how silly things are, I love the unrealistic drama and I love criticizing the overreactions. I compare how I'd act in a depressing dramatic scene and I enjoy doing these things. 

I also love bad movies. I love the no budget big monster movies of the 40s and 50s. I love the weird little indie skits posted on YouTube, filmed in personal apartments where costumes are the actors clothes and the effects could be better. I love the men in rubber suits as aliens and monsters. I love seeing where the wire it attached to the actor and how they're flying, awkwardly fulcrumed at their waist. I love it so much. I also love critical darlings, I love the things audiences rave about and (well, not always) and I love the award winners. I'm in it for the drama and the suspense. Even when i can predict how a movie will go based on genre, I still love it. Even when I want to punch a character for being an idiot, I find things to love.

At it's core it's an escapist fantasy. Movies are a way to explore a world a bit different from the one we live in and I like to believe in that dream. 

I think about the things I like about 'bad' movies and it's not just that it's bad. It's that it tried. It tried and it failed but it has heart. In every bad line delivery and every weird cut, there was someone working on this movie that loved it and believed in what it could be. Any time an actor changes because they got mad at every else, or they realized what they were in was terrible, I love that the creator decided that the film has to be finished and released. The crew on the side of the frame and in reflections, the robot effect that failed and was still used. It's the creative dream and vision. The passion that drove that creator to bankruptcy and infamy sometimes. I also love the spirit, usually the sets sound like they were fun as everything was ridiculous and it was an experience for all involved. It's more than just putting a narrative together to share, it's expression without pretension and the drive to create even if it's not ultimately what you envisioned and it's what you desired. It's the heart of it. Someone believed in it and not just because of the money, they believed in something else. 

When I say i hope that something is delightfully awful, the premise sounds ridiculous and that there's no way this movie could be good but it also seems so ridiculous it has to be fun to watch. It's a movie to get drunk to, to watch with friends on a Friday night and yell at a the screen and laughing at the characters. I'm not laughing at someone's dream, I'm enjoying it so much I have to laugh in general. It becomes more than a movie, it becomes a shared experience, in-jokes and quoted monologues.